It would be really mean to write a poem about a town that was less than complementary wouldn't it?
Hey, well that's just the way I roll.
Ode to Morecambe*
Morecambe, its a little bit shit
Its a little bit shit
In Morecambe
Morecambe, there's fuck all in it
That's why its so shit
In Morecambe
There's not even branded pound-shops
Chains are missing 'cept in Argos
All them gold rings are just brassy
Cos in Morecambe, No one's classy.
*No offence is meant to people who live in Bare or towards Hest Bank. You just happen to be in Morecambe. Sorry about that.
Monday 16 September 2013
Tuesday 9 July 2013
I guess it's summer.
Its a heady 20 C here today and where I live that's scorching hot. I don't think we know quite what to do with ourselves. You see, normally, it begins to rain at the start of June and carries on all through July and August before stopping, briefly, for a couple of weeks in September before the October rain starts. This whole sun and warmth thing in July is most confusing.
This isn't my best ode, but it pretty much sums up how it is here at the moment.
Ode to it being a bit hot
There's a lot of shirtless lobsters,
There's a lot of tiny skirts
There's a lot of sweaty cyclists
and I'll tell you what is worse
That we all look quite bewildered
That the sun is in the sky
and perplexed it isn't raining
Like is normal in July.
This isn't my best ode, but it pretty much sums up how it is here at the moment.
Ode to it being a bit hot
There's a lot of shirtless lobsters,
There's a lot of tiny skirts
There's a lot of sweaty cyclists
and I'll tell you what is worse
That we all look quite bewildered
That the sun is in the sky
and perplexed it isn't raining
Like is normal in July.
Wednesday 3 July 2013
Simon and Carbunkle
Whilst digging in my vault of useless stuff, I found this version of the Sound of Silence that I wrote when on Mat leave with baby-babyheave.
It made me smile as it refers back to a time when I was at home procrastinating, rather than in work procrastinating. Gosh. I've come so far.
The Sound of Mumsnet
Hello Mumsnet my old friend
I've come to post on you again
Because the youngest DCs sleeping
and the eldest is not peeping
and My DH is now watching boring sport
Of some sort
And so I'm here
On Mumsnet
In Morrrisons I shopped alone
then I lugged the groceries home
And then although the house needs cleaning
I found the thought just so demeaning
When my hands were spared by the thought of a fresh bun fight
On this web site
And so I'm here
On Mumsnet
And in the forums here I saw
Three hundred people, may be more
People posting random queries
drunken threads where posts are bleary
People starting threads that no one answers there
If they don't care
It's all in here
On Mumsnet
The fools that ask AIBU
and when told yes refuse its true
the parents obsessed with their buggies
advice on real nappies or huggies
And the topics where so few go silence falls
within their walls
Its all in here
On Mumsnet
But I must go now with regret
Before I'm accused of negect
As My eldest is now calling
and the youngest's started squalling
And My DH's banging on about the final scoree
its such a bore
but no more can I spend time
On mumsnet
It made me smile as it refers back to a time when I was at home procrastinating, rather than in work procrastinating. Gosh. I've come so far.
The Sound of Mumsnet
Hello Mumsnet my old friend
I've come to post on you again
Because the youngest DCs sleeping
and the eldest is not peeping
and My DH is now watching boring sport
Of some sort
And so I'm here
On Mumsnet
In Morrrisons I shopped alone
then I lugged the groceries home
And then although the house needs cleaning
I found the thought just so demeaning
When my hands were spared by the thought of a fresh bun fight
On this web site
And so I'm here
On Mumsnet
And in the forums here I saw
Three hundred people, may be more
People posting random queries
drunken threads where posts are bleary
People starting threads that no one answers there
If they don't care
It's all in here
On Mumsnet
The fools that ask AIBU
and when told yes refuse its true
the parents obsessed with their buggies
advice on real nappies or huggies
And the topics where so few go silence falls
within their walls
Its all in here
On Mumsnet
But I must go now with regret
Before I'm accused of negect
As My eldest is now calling
and the youngest's started squalling
And My DH's banging on about the final scoree
its such a bore
but no more can I spend time
On mumsnet
Friday 28 June 2013
This has really got my goat / throat.
And so it begins. The
Daily Fail has published an article saying how calling the attack on Nigella
Lawson ‘domestic violence’ demeans people who are suffering from real domestic
violence.
This is marvellous news.
Since grabbing by the throat and twisting someone’s nose isn’t violence,
I know what I’m going to be doing this weekend, and if anyone complains, I'll explain that its demeaning of them to call it violence as I've not murdered them.
Ode to the Victim
Blaming Daily Mail
Thank god for the Daily Mail!
Without them I would never knowThat there’s a sliding scale
And that some domestic violence
Is OK now just so long
As it’s not as bad as other types
That we know still go on.
Thank god that we’ve cleared that up!
Without it I would still have thought That grabbing by the throat
Was in fact domestic violence
But I now know if I’m cross
I can do it to my husband
And all with no morals lost!
Thank god for the Daily Fail!
Without them I would never knowThat there’s a sliding scale
Of criminality so long as
Something is much worse
So since you’ve not been murdered
Don’t report I’ve nicked your purse.
Fuckers.
The party of the third part...
Today I am mostly writing contracts for 3rd
parties. There's not much else I can say about that really.
Contractual Ode
4.1
4.1.1 The licensor of this ode is not contractually obliged to
provide enjoyment.
4.1.2 The licensee of this ode may choose to terminate their reading
at any time.
4.1.3 This is the kind of thing I have to write for my employment.
4.1.4 This is the reason why I waste my time
4.1.5 Writing silly rhyme.
Wednesday 26 June 2013
I'd never know by looking at you!
I have bipolar affective disorder. I'm not bothered about people knowing as its just part of who I am. My direct reports at work know, my friends know, my family know. Every so often though, you get a comment that makes you go HMMM.
While having a conversation about health with colleagues today, it was mentioned in passing about me having time off ill. "What's wrong with you" I was asked. I told them and they came out with this gem - "well I'd never know by looking at you!"
Yes, because you can tell by looking at someone whether they have a mental illness, can't you.
Ode to not having two heads
I don't have two heads.
You may find this hard to believe
but an extra head didn't grow when I got ill.
And my face is the same colour
as it always was before
and my eyes and nose and ears
are all there still.
While having a conversation about health with colleagues today, it was mentioned in passing about me having time off ill. "What's wrong with you" I was asked. I told them and they came out with this gem - "well I'd never know by looking at you!"
Yes, because you can tell by looking at someone whether they have a mental illness, can't you.
Ode to not having two heads
I don't have two heads.
You may find this hard to believe
but an extra head didn't grow when I got ill.
And my face is the same colour
as it always was before
and my eyes and nose and ears
are all there still.
Saturday 22 June 2013
Thanks for telling me, but you can go now...
I like a bit of lively discussion. I also like feminism.
I like a bit of lively discussion about feminism.
I like a bit of lively discussion about feminism with anyone who may be interested.
I'm not so interested in men who claim they want to discuss feminism, while telling me not to worry my pretty little head about it. Then get angry when I don't shut up. Its irksome in the extreme.
Ode to the Mansplainer
It's curious, I'm curious,
You're arguments are spurious
And your disdain as you mansplain
While slowly getting furious
Does make me question once again
If there's something that I've missed
About why you'd want to tell me
That you're not a feminist.
I like a bit of lively discussion about feminism.
I like a bit of lively discussion about feminism with anyone who may be interested.
I'm not so interested in men who claim they want to discuss feminism, while telling me not to worry my pretty little head about it. Then get angry when I don't shut up. Its irksome in the extreme.
Ode to the Mansplainer
It's curious, I'm curious,
You're arguments are spurious
And your disdain as you mansplain
While slowly getting furious
Does make me question once again
If there's something that I've missed
About why you'd want to tell me
That you're not a feminist.
Skylanders are stealing my life.
They've invented hard core drugs for 6-8yo boys. They're called Skylanders. Small Heave loves them with a passion. I've even got him doing the laundry to earn money to buy the things, but at £8 to £16 a pop, they suck his money out of his pocket and time from his life.
See what I mean about the correlation with hard core drugs? Hell yeah.
One night while having a major bout of insomnia, I started my own game. I am now addicted. I have my own Skylander called Hot Dog and he's hidden in the cupboard where Small Heave can't find it. This is ridiculous behaviour for a middle aged woman.
Ode To Skylanders
I may be pushing forty
or maybe a little more
but those little bits of plastic
strewn upon the back room floor
hold a dirty little secret
as when dark takes over light
I come down when they're sleeping
and I play the game all night.
See what I mean about the correlation with hard core drugs? Hell yeah.
One night while having a major bout of insomnia, I started my own game. I am now addicted. I have my own Skylander called Hot Dog and he's hidden in the cupboard where Small Heave can't find it. This is ridiculous behaviour for a middle aged woman.
Ode To Skylanders
I may be pushing forty
or maybe a little more
but those little bits of plastic
strewn upon the back room floor
hold a dirty little secret
as when dark takes over light
I come down when they're sleeping
and I play the game all night.
Friday 21 June 2013
Summat a bit sentimental for a Friday Night
I live in a beautiful part of the world. Mountains, lakes and the seaside all rolled into one. Usually I'm too pissed off that its raining to appreciate the beauty though. I'm the same generally with love and sentimentality so it doesn't appear much in my poems.
I suppose what I'm trying to say is that its unlikely I'll post another sentimental-ish poem on here, so appreciate it while you can.
Ode with sentimental undertones.
I can see a long way from my window, the fields and trees before me
Misty in the morning and clear when in the sun.
I can see the birds when flying, I can see those landed calling
from the first new light of morning to the setting of the sun.
I don't often see what's near me, though its nearer than the mountains
That I can see so clearly from my window every day
I often miss what's close to me and hurt the things that I don't see
but still I'd rather miss you here than see you far away.
Some thing are simply meant to be
seen, and others not
Some things are just the way they are
and change them you can not.
So when I see things close to me
and know just what they mean to me
I learn to not look far away
and cherish what I've got.
I can see a long way from my window, the fields and trees before me
Misty in the morning and clear when in the sun.
But I can see much more than this by using more than just my eyes
I see that which is closer than the mountains and the sky
I suppose what I'm trying to say is that its unlikely I'll post another sentimental-ish poem on here, so appreciate it while you can.
Ode with sentimental undertones.
I can see a long way from my window, the fields and trees before me
Misty in the morning and clear when in the sun.
I can see the birds when flying, I can see those landed calling
from the first new light of morning to the setting of the sun.
I don't often see what's near me, though its nearer than the mountains
That I can see so clearly from my window every day
I often miss what's close to me and hurt the things that I don't see
but still I'd rather miss you here than see you far away.
Some thing are simply meant to be
seen, and others not
Some things are just the way they are
and change them you can not.
So when I see things close to me
and know just what they mean to me
I learn to not look far away
and cherish what I've got.
I can see a long way from my window, the fields and trees before me
Misty in the morning and clear when in the sun.
But I can see much more than this by using more than just my eyes
I see that which is closer than the mountains and the sky
Friday in the office
Everyone gets a bit weekend happy in the office on a Friday. Sadly, this Friday I have a to-list the size of an elephant, so am not exactly Mrs. Tolerant. At least pigeon man has flown the nest for the day. I should be grateful for that at least!
While all the little minions shirk,
Shut up says I, I'm trying to work!
But what on Monday works quite well
Is so-so in my Friday hell.
Thursday 20 June 2013
Clubbing together.
Clubbing used to be late nights, dancing and talking crap for hours with strangers. Now it refers to after school activity hell. Whoop and hooray for middle age and children.
Ode to the After School Club
Ode to the After School Club
It's kind of sweaty in the gym
With all the parents looking in
I know my child is having fun
I'm not, but I'm a waiting mum
Monday 17 June 2013
Strange way to emphasise a point Saatchi.
I don't often do sleb or topical stuff, but frankly after seeing the photos of Saatchi abusing (for that is what it was) his wife in public, then reading his statement that he grabbed her by the throat to emphasise a point, I wondered how stupid he thinks people actually are.
Then I remembered about victim blaming and how some folk will think she deserved it, or wound him up, or, or, or....
Ode to Saatchi the Domestic Abuser
Saatchi oh Saatchi
you vile little fella
I watch as you blame
that attack on Nigella.
There's never a reason
to grab by the throat
you nasty abuser
you vile little scroat.
Dear god you are lucky
that in our society
violence on women
can't bring notoriety
dammit its always
the victim who's blamed
though you're the aggressor
its her who'll be shamed.
Saatchi oh Saatchi
I see your reliance
to control your woman
you resort to violence.
You controlling arsehole
you nasty old loser
we know what's inside you,
you violent abuser.
Then I remembered about victim blaming and how some folk will think she deserved it, or wound him up, or, or, or....
Ode to Saatchi the Domestic Abuser
Saatchi oh Saatchi
you vile little fella
I watch as you blame
that attack on Nigella.
There's never a reason
to grab by the throat
you nasty abuser
you vile little scroat.
Dear god you are lucky
that in our society
violence on women
can't bring notoriety
dammit its always
the victim who's blamed
though you're the aggressor
its her who'll be shamed.
Saatchi oh Saatchi
I see your reliance
to control your woman
you resort to violence.
You controlling arsehole
you nasty old loser
we know what's inside you,
you violent abuser.
Sunday 16 June 2013
Bohemian Mumsnetty
Mumsnet is my second home. I moved in there a few years ago and have found the rent very reasonable and the company mostly enjoyable. Lots of my odes over the past few years have been for my Mumsnet friends and this one is no different.
Quick translation for those not in the know:
Luff / luffs / luffly = love, loves, lovely.
AIBU = Am I being unreasonable, the site's holding pen for keyboard warriors.
Greggs sausage roll = Greggs is a bakers in the UK. My town is tiny, but still manages to support 3 Greggs. If you can wrap it in pastry, you can buy it in Greggs.
Flounce = leave the site in a huff, usually posting a "so long, I can't take it anymore" post in Flouncers' Corner.
Bohemian Mumsnetty
Look how my life's changed
Since having the baby
I'm overwhelmed
By the choices that now face me
I'll go on line to have a whine and see
There is a forum
It holds answers for me
Because its baby come, baby grow
Toddler strop, school they go
Evil smelly teens then
Nest is empty again
You see.
Mumsnet, just fed my child
On a Gregg’s sausage roll
When he's just turned 6 months old
Mumsnet I've just had a race
Crashed my car into the last
Parent - child space
Mumsnet Oooooh
How did I miss that…
My husband was a lying cheating twat?
His affairs
Carried on
Should I just leave the bastard?
Too late, I have to go
I'm on here every night; I'm addicted to the site
Goodbye everybody; AIBU?
Going hide you threads and post in somewhere new.
Mumsnet Ooooh
I don't want to flounce
But sometimes wish I'd never logged on at all...
I see a little silhouette of a clique
No not us! No not us! We are really quiet lovely!
Put all the in-jokes on: Purpose of the thread gone eek!
You're so luffly
No your're luffly
You're so luffly
No YOU'RE luffly
You're so luffly
Luffs you so!
I'm gonna blow!
I'm just a step mum nobody loves me
She's just a step mum from a step family
Must not complain about her DSD.
Trends may come trends may go, Per Una is no
Yes Boden, though Per Una is a no
(it’s a no) Yes Boden! Per Una is a no
(it’s a no) Yes Boden! Per una is a no
(it’s a no) Una is a no
(It's a no) Una is a no (its a no) Ah
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Style and Beauty, Style and Beauty, Style and Beauty let me go
Beelzebub has some Mum Boots put aside for me
For me
For meeeeeeee!
(Mosh)
So you think your opion on here's all that?
Be it feeding or homework or kids who are fat?
Oh, baby, better breastfeed that baby,
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here
But! Then we help each other, giving time for free,
That's what really matters,
That's what really matters to me...
In Bohemiam Mumsnet-eeeeeeeee!
Quick translation for those not in the know:
Luff / luffs / luffly = love, loves, lovely.
AIBU = Am I being unreasonable, the site's holding pen for keyboard warriors.
Greggs sausage roll = Greggs is a bakers in the UK. My town is tiny, but still manages to support 3 Greggs. If you can wrap it in pastry, you can buy it in Greggs.
Flounce = leave the site in a huff, usually posting a "so long, I can't take it anymore" post in Flouncers' Corner.
Bohemian Mumsnetty
Look how my life's changed
Since having the baby
I'm overwhelmed
By the choices that now face me
I'll go on line to have a whine and see
There is a forum
It holds answers for me
Because its baby come, baby grow
Toddler strop, school they go
Evil smelly teens then
Nest is empty again
You see.
Mumsnet, just fed my child
On a Gregg’s sausage roll
When he's just turned 6 months old
Mumsnet I've just had a race
Crashed my car into the last
Parent - child space
Mumsnet Oooooh
How did I miss that…
My husband was a lying cheating twat?
His affairs
Carried on
Should I just leave the bastard?
Too late, I have to go
I'm on here every night; I'm addicted to the site
Goodbye everybody; AIBU?
Going hide you threads and post in somewhere new.
Mumsnet Ooooh
I don't want to flounce
But sometimes wish I'd never logged on at all...
I see a little silhouette of a clique
No not us! No not us! We are really quiet lovely!
Put all the in-jokes on: Purpose of the thread gone eek!
You're so luffly
No your're luffly
You're so luffly
No YOU'RE luffly
You're so luffly
Luffs you so!
I'm gonna blow!
I'm just a step mum nobody loves me
She's just a step mum from a step family
Must not complain about her DSD.
Trends may come trends may go, Per Una is no
Yes Boden, though Per Una is a no
(it’s a no) Yes Boden! Per Una is a no
(it’s a no) Yes Boden! Per una is a no
(it’s a no) Una is a no
(It's a no) Una is a no (its a no) Ah
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Style and Beauty, Style and Beauty, Style and Beauty let me go
Beelzebub has some Mum Boots put aside for me
For me
For meeeeeeee!
(Mosh)
So you think your opion on here's all that?
Be it feeding or homework or kids who are fat?
Oh, baby, better breastfeed that baby,
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here
But! Then we help each other, giving time for free,
That's what really matters,
That's what really matters to me...
In Bohemiam Mumsnet-eeeeeeeee!
Saturday 15 June 2013
The morning after the night before
Sometimes when you get to the end of an evening of eating and boozing with your friends, it suddenly seems like a good idea to drink whatever's left in the bottom of the bottles in your drinks cabinet. It's never a good idea, is it?
Ode to Bad Ideas with Alcohol
Jack Daniels send you loopy
and absinthe can make you blind
but they're best not drunk together
of your sense you will not find
when the day after the party
where you thought you'd sink a few
and you wake up in your nighty
Someone's t-shirt and one shoe.
Ode to Bad Ideas with Alcohol
Jack Daniels send you loopy
and absinthe can make you blind
but they're best not drunk together
of your sense you will not find
when the day after the party
where you thought you'd sink a few
and you wake up in your nighty
Someone's t-shirt and one shoe.
Old woman, old woman, where have you been?
For reasons of tact and diplomacy, I can't link this verse to anyone in particular. Its enough that I know.
Ode to the Old Lady
In your Arran Knit of doom
You lurk upon the sofa there
with noxious vapours in the room
Released by you into the air
And as you comment on TV
Believing that we care to know
of all your musings running free
on every bloody single show
Ode to the Old Lady
In your Arran Knit of doom
You lurk upon the sofa there
with noxious vapours in the room
Released by you into the air
And as you comment on TV
Believing that we care to know
of all your musings running free
on every bloody single show
Burning Desire
Most people give buckets of sympathy when someone is having medical treatment, especially when its in a sensitive place. Other, crapper friends write a short verse.
Ode to my Friend
Oh what a day,
What a day
I wish today would go away
I'm sorry that I have to whinge
But someone's going to singe my minge
Ode to my Friend
Oh what a day,
What a day
I wish today would go away
I'm sorry that I have to whinge
But someone's going to singe my minge
Friday 14 June 2013
Just a quick one before I go...
Every time I walk across my son's bedroom floor in bare feet, this little ode comes to mind.
Ode To Lego
Fucking lego
Fucking lego
In my foot
Bastard toy.
Ode To Lego
Fucking lego
Fucking lego
In my foot
Bastard toy.
Ode to the Pigeon Man
There's a bloke in my office that keeps on cooing like a pigeon. Every time one of those winged rats coos outside the window, he coos right back. Let's just say its really fucking annoying. Its been suggested to me that I get a sparrow hawk costume or fit some of those spike things to his chair, but I think that's a bit excessive. I may just thump him instead.
Ode to Pigeon Man
Why must you coo
Why must you coo
Its that annoying thing you do
And though the pigeons do it too
you're not a bird you are just you
You're cooing really takes the piss
I can't take one more day of this
So if you coo
So if you coo
I'm going to thwack you
With my shoe.
Ode to Pigeon Man
Why must you coo
Why must you coo
Its that annoying thing you do
And though the pigeons do it too
you're not a bird you are just you
You're cooing really takes the piss
I can't take one more day of this
So if you coo
So if you coo
I'm going to thwack you
With my shoe.
Wednesday 12 June 2013
What is a troll? Through the medium of song!
This came about on an utterly mad on-line Mumsnet discussion about why people troll. I make no apology for the blatant rip-off of Evita.
TrollVita
It won't be easy
You'll think I'm strange
When I try to explain how I feel
That I still have to troll
For no reason at all.
You won't believe me
All you will see
Is some sad act its true
Who has to make up random shit
And post it on here to get you
I had to let it happen
I had to change
Couldn't stay all alone in my flat
Looking out at real people
Staring at a blank screen
So I chose forums
Reading around posting everything new
But nothing impressed me at all
That's when I said fuck it! Troll you!
Don't cry for me there on Mumsnet
The truth is he never left me
I might have wrote it
But it didn't happen
I also didn't
donate a kidney
And as for bun fights and as for flames
I often invited them in
So you'd bitch at each other
it was all I desired!
I'd post illusions
so you'd give me solutions
and would promise me
Your care and attention and time
I fooled you with sock puppetry
Don't cry for me there on Mumsnet
Don't cry for me there on Mumsnet
The truth is he never left me
I might have wrote it
But it didn't happen
I also didn't
donate a kidney
Have I post too much?
There's plenty more I can think of to say to you
But all you have to do
Is look at me to know
That not one fucking word was true!
TrollVita
It won't be easy
You'll think I'm strange
When I try to explain how I feel
That I still have to troll
For no reason at all.
You won't believe me
All you will see
Is some sad act its true
Who has to make up random shit
And post it on here to get you
I had to let it happen
I had to change
Couldn't stay all alone in my flat
Looking out at real people
Staring at a blank screen
So I chose forums
Reading around posting everything new
But nothing impressed me at all
That's when I said fuck it! Troll you!
Don't cry for me there on Mumsnet
The truth is he never left me
I might have wrote it
But it didn't happen
I also didn't
donate a kidney
And as for bun fights and as for flames
I often invited them in
So you'd bitch at each other
it was all I desired!
I'd post illusions
so you'd give me solutions
and would promise me
Your care and attention and time
I fooled you with sock puppetry
Don't cry for me there on Mumsnet
Don't cry for me there on Mumsnet
The truth is he never left me
I might have wrote it
But it didn't happen
I also didn't
donate a kidney
Have I post too much?
There's plenty more I can think of to say to you
But all you have to do
Is look at me to know
That not one fucking word was true!
Tuesday 11 June 2013
Doom Cats of Cognitive Dissonance
While I'm in the mood for verse, I wrote this one for some of my lovely feminist friends. The phrase "Doom Cats of Cognitive Dissonance" came about on a Mumsnet feminism thread to describe some posters who insist on complaining about women who, well, want the best for other women.
Doom Cats of Cognitive Dissonance
I am a doom cat of cognitive dissonance
Fuck off, fuck off, you awkward feminist!
I say its my right to be marginalised and terrorised
Just cos my genitals don't hang on the outside.
So what if I want to cook dinner for my man
(ignoring the fact that feminism says
If that's what I want I can).
I am a doom cat of cognitive dissonance
Don't make me feel awkward you bastard feminist.
Doom Cats of Cognitive Dissonance
I am a doom cat of cognitive dissonance
Fuck off, fuck off, you awkward feminist!
I say its my right to be marginalised and terrorised
Just cos my genitals don't hang on the outside.
So what if I want to cook dinner for my man
(ignoring the fact that feminism says
If that's what I want I can).
I am a doom cat of cognitive dissonance
Don't make me feel awkward you bastard feminist.
Ode to the Mad No Bra Lady
I wrote a load of silly poems when I was Chez Nurse Ratchet last year. Mainly because my sense of humour wasn't broken and was still there to see me through, but also because stupid verse is my forte. I've forgotten most of them (being nuts plays with your memory) but will always remember this one.
Unless you brought your own food in, your only options at breakfast were cereal or toast. This didn't deter mad-no-bra-lady from demanding a little something more...
Ode to the Mad No Bra Lady
Oh how I weep for your persecuted ire!
But there were no eggs
There are no eggs.
Just bran flakes...
Unless you brought your own food in, your only options at breakfast were cereal or toast. This didn't deter mad-no-bra-lady from demanding a little something more...
Ode to the Mad No Bra Lady
Oh how I weep for your persecuted ire!
But there were no eggs
There are no eggs.
Just bran flakes...
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